Apparently I'm an Adult

walk into the club like wait nevermind can we go home

faraashah:

if my husband doesn’t cry when he sees me on our wedding day I will softy kick him in the shin until he sheds a tear 

Out of morbid curiosity, Catherine, are there any circumstances where you won’t kick me in the shins till I cry?

Vetches and passion flowers have modified some of their leaves and converted them into tendrils. These grope around in space until they touch the stem of another plant and swiftly coil around it. The tendrils then coil and pull the plant up towards the sunlight.

bachofficial:

Seeing someone from school in public.

image

goldenbrightsun:

scarykeion:

kelbebop:

Alas, poor Yorick. You were glam as fuck.

THIS IS IN IAMBIC PENTAMETER


someone please write the rest of this sonnet

goldenbrightsun:

scarykeion:

kelbebop:

Alas, poor Yorick. You were glam as fuck.

THIS IS IN IAMBIC PENTAMETER

someone please write the rest of this sonnet

Epigraphs from Lemony Snicket’s A Series of Unfortunate Events as tweets

santaurl:

NOTHIN SAYS KINKY AND WILd like. A MICKEY MOUSE MASK

santaurl:

NOTHIN SAYS KINKY AND WILd like. A MICKEY MOUSE MASK

commanderholly:

daxdaydreams:

becausebirds:

A penguin who was previously made a Colonel-in-Chief of the Norwegian Army has been knighted at Edinburgh Zoo.

Penguin Nils Olav has been an honorary member and mascot of the Norwegian King’s Guard since 1972.

Over the years, he has been promoted through the ranks after being adopted by Royal Guard who visited the zoo.

During the ceremony, Nils had a sword dubbed on each side of his head, where his shoulders should be, to confirm his regimental knighthood.

The proud penguin was on his best behavior throughout most of the ceremony, but shortly before the ritual was concluded and possibly suffering a bout of nerves he was seen to deposit a discreet white puddle on the ground.

Sir Nils Olav the penguin.

Sir Nils Olav. Living the dream.

Amazing. 

kingkristoffs:

And then I got thrown in jail!